Thursday, July 12, 2012

Being a bride is now a 'natural disaster.' Thankfully, the government is here to help.

A monster, looks like Godzilla, a chevy car in his hand, destroys the city while a frighten citizen runs far away from him. Do you have your emergency disaster plan
for your special day? At Jezebel, Katie J.M. Baker has the catch o' the day with this gem: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have prepared a how-to guide'sorry, a taxpayer-funded how-to guide'for surviving the "natural disaster" that is a bride.

Yes, because a woman on her wedding day is just like an earthquake. Or maybe it's a tornado. A hurricane? Flood. Well, whatever. Something natural and disastrous. The guide'sorry, taxpayer-funded guide'written by moonlighting comedian Caitlin Shockey, begins by noting the striking similarities between surviving a hurricane and surviving a wedding day:

We're sure it's just a fluke that wedding season happens to coincide with hurricane season. [...] Being in the throes of wedding season, many of us here at CDC realized that planning for a wedding isn't that much different from planning for a disaster. Just remember: Get a Kit, Make a Plan, and Be Informed.
That joke probably goes over especially well in New Orleans. No doubt those who were fleeing their drowning homes during Hurricane Katrina were probably thinking, Damnit! Shoulda gone with the live band instead of the DJ!

(Continue reading below the fold.)


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