Breaking: Generic Obama-hating conservative stands by horribly boring conspiracy theory

When last we looked at the story of the University of Chicago looking to pave over toddler-Ronald-Reagan's onetime home and put up a parking lot, we heard from a conspiracy-peddling conservative crackpot that it was all a plot against Toddler Reagan by the vast, crony-riddled empire of Barack Obama, who I guess really hates the idea of Reagan in short pants.

Well, this week the aforementioned crackpot wants you to know he is super-duper serious about his paranoid speculations "reporting." First off, other crackpots believe it too, so there's got to be something behind it, right?

Hyde Park residents were upset because while the University was planning to bulldoze the Reagan home, it has been aggressively bidding to be the site of the future Obama presidential library. People were upset that the Reagan site could potentially be used as a parking lot for that library.

And second of all, the university, administration, and several area pigeons all denied the story, but you can't trust them because duh, they don't like conservative "reporting":

Neither does the White House, which called the report "false,' and 'shocking.' But this is the same White House that continues to laugh off troubling questions on Benghazi, Fast and Furious, and the president's use or misuse of Executive Orders.

And neither does the University of Chicago, which recently wrote a letter requesting (demanding) a correction to my column.

Well, Benghazi proves everything. He's got us there.

Anyway, there's only one way to settle this. A pledge on the part of the university:

Will future library patrons be prevented from using the parking lot?

Hmm. Well, he's got us there, too. It's possible the University of Chicago could someday host an Obama library. And while it's a damn big campus, it's possible that, no matter where that hypothetical Obama library is, somebody might pass through that parking lot on their way there, or even actually park in it. Maybe they get lost and don't know where to park? Maybe the other lots are full? Anyway, the only proper way to resolve this is to promise, right now, that if that ever happens that wayward Obama library patron will be beaten to death with large replicas of the Statue of Liberty and/or Bonzo, because that is what Toddler Reagan would have wanted, and good gawd this whole conversation has turned strange. No, wait'it started strange.

But kudos, guy, for wedging in references to both Benghazi and Fast and Furious into speculation about the conspiracy by the administration and half of Chicago to tear down this one apartment building. And kudos to Fox News for giving this brave American a platform for exposing this sinister plot.