Student body president John Boehner's 10 worst frenemies'and why they all hate him

Voting no on your next speaker, before he wins, is like coming at the king with the EXPRESS PURPOSE of missing
' @daveweigel via TweetDeck John Boehner already has a caucus full of people who hate him, from backbencher tea party weirdos who won't march to any tune, to his supposed second-in-command, who betrayed him on the New Year's fiscal cliff vote'just like most Republicans in Congress.

But Jan. 3, swearing-in day, offered a new start, just like the first day back at school: a chance to let bygones be bygones, an opportunity for everyone to put aside their egos and tamp down their pride and get back to business (even if the prior Congress did almost no work at all).

But 10 comically dedicated members of the GOP chose to mark the moment by deliberately not fitting in, as ungraciously as they possibly could. This hapless tensome decided to vote against John Boehner as the next speaker of the House, even knowing he was certain to win the job once again. Dave Weigel, quoted above channeling Omar Little, is right on the money. So yeah, there's no shortage of troublemakers looking to make life miserable for Boehner, but if you want a handy shortlist of wayward Republicans who will spend the next two years sticking thorns in their leader's side, here it is (along with the name of whichever hapless soul they voted for):

Justin Amash (MI-03): Raul Labrador
Jim Bridenstine (OK-01): Eric Cantor
Paul Broun (GA-10): Allen West
Louie Gohmert (TX-01): Allen West
Tim Huelskamp (KS-01): Jim Jordan
Walter Jones (NC-03): David Walker
Thomas Massie (KY-04): Justin Amash
Steve Pearce (NM-02): Eric Cantor
Ted Yoho (FL-03): Eric Cantor
Steve Stockman (TX-36): "Present"

Four of these winners are really getting off on the right foot: As freshmen, Bridenstine, Massie, Yoho, and Stockman practically all begged Boehner to give them atomic wedgies on day one. Notably, Bridenstein and Yoho both beat incumbents in primaries, suggesting a devil-may-care attitude, while Massie (a hardcore Paulist) won a bitter open-seat primary on the strength of outside libertarian cash, infuriating the local establishment. Those with long memories will also recall that Stockman, a reject from the class of 1994, was too stupid to last more than a single term his first time in the House. Clearly, he's gunning for that award once more.

Meanwhile, Amash, Huelskamp, and Jones were all booted from their committee assignments by a very unhappy leadership, on account of them triggering the "asshole factor," in Rep. Lynn Westmoreland's immortal words. (The fourth victim of that purge, Arizona's David Schweikert, swallowed hard and sucked it up for Boehner.) As for Broun, Gohmert, and Pearce, well, every college campus is haunted by those creepy loner super-seniors who never seem able to graduate, right? So that's them.

But that's just my gloss. I want to hear from each of these dystopians why they did what they did. Fortunately, swearing-in is covered by tons of reporters, but there are few newsy stories worth writing up. So when someone strays, like the members of this clueless minyan all did, that gets noticed. Follow me to this crazy schoolyard below the fold and see how they all justified themselves (and sniffed about how they were never picked first in gym class)'in their own words.